Bee-Cause of Big Lips

by sean kemble

No, I don't have big lips or small lips, they're normal lips. The bee stung my upper lip. An experiment. As if hot needles were stabbing in up through my skull. My eyes screamed from tears. I get whims. Based on logic and impulsivity. However insane it may seem. Certainly one can't always act on an idea. Madness makes a better lover for poets and priests. I like to go in directions few will tread. The bee was an idea after reading something about cosmetic lip enhancement. How doctors inject fat from ones ass to fill out an anorexic upper lip. My adolescent theory was that perhaps the bee venom could be used as a kind of temporary beauty aid. Later to be marketed for profit.

Botox is made from the highly toxic food poisoning bacterium that causes botulism. Used successfully for years in the treatment of wrinkles. Injected right into the affected area. It has been accepted as common practice. There's millions to be made in vanity.

Bee stung lips. We've heard this expression to describe sensual, full lips. " You have sexy, big-ass, juicy lips,"  I say to her. Lips are obsessed about through media, songs and literature. "Kiss me you fool" she said. Guys will talk about 'blow job lips' when looking at certain nubiles.

 Recently in a survey taken at colleges, it was found that 57% of girls would cheat on their boyfriends to have sex with Angelina Jolie. Those lips are pornographic.There should be a NC17 rating on her pictures based on her lips alone.

The idea was to temporarily cause a swelling where my lips would be slightly swollen. The effect lasting a couple days. I see it being marketed as a kind of disposable lips. Perhaps used in the modeling industry for models who have smaller lips. The venom would be harvested and injected later into the area using a syringe. Bees have been used to treat certain auto-immune illnesses. Where people purposely sting themselves for treatment. I saw this on a science channel before. So the concept itself seemed somewhat sane. haha.

 My friends know I'll do such things. Perhaps their encouragment was motivated by malt liquor and sunshine by the pool. Nevertheless, I'm a fire eater when the mood strikes. I'll cross safe lines. I caught two bees on a rose bush with a jar and brought them inside.

Murdering a bee is easy. Once they sting, their guts rip out. I held it by its wings, took some quick breaths, and held it to my upper lip. My friends eyes were wide. "Ahhhhh!! Shit!!!...Jesus!!!.." I reeled back. The pain was like a hot needle shooting through my face up through my skull. I quickly removed the stinger, not wanting more venom to pump into me. My threshhold to pain is high. I'm no masochist. But the little devil hit me harder than expected. "FUCK!! Oh God..What the FUUUCK!!!" My "be-a-mad-genius-or-die" philosophy was fucking my ass.

Being that the lips are a very sensitive part of the anatomy. Much like genitals, I felt one minute of pure agony. And the whole experience wasn't really necessary. I have nice, well formed lips. It was about science and being an inconoclast. Taking the narrow path where few tread. For humanity?

After the shock wore off, the swelling began. No redness though. This was a pleasant surprise. Within thirty minutes it had already approached the fullness i wanted. It seemed to improve the appearance. Yep, it did. Only temporarily though before the growing horror.

It must have been an allergic reaction.The swelling would not stop. Soon I had Steven Tyler's mouth. A bit later I was a character on The Simpsons. My lip hanging over a bit. Still no redness. And surprisingly the lip ballooned as if made to do so with no pain. This was more than a fat lip though. I would have to hide out for days. My girlfriend freaked and laughed mercilessly like cute, bitchy girls will do. I never went to the doctor.

The next morning in the mirror I was stunned. The lip was enormous. An inch or more wide. Like something I saw on the old Twilight Zone before. My profile was freakish. A grotesquerie. Hysterically laughing, my friend tried to take my picture. I wouldn't allow any images of the deformity. I wish I had pictures now. It was traumatizing and i didn't want to see myself immortalized that way.

 The swelling seemed to reach the apex, and gradually went back to normal within three days.

Recently a guy received the Nobel Prize for discovering that bacteria caused stomach ulcers, not stress like previously believed. He used himself as a guinea pig to prove his theory.

Yeah, that's right, I want a fucking Nobel Prize. Because even though seemingly my test went awry, it really did not. There was a temporary enhancement to my lip. And used conservatively by a trained person, I believe it could be used with success and profit. 

Maybe lips aren't that important comparitively to other issues. So I wouldn't get the prize. But if it's implemented without much pain by a doctor and sold as 'Temporary Jolie Lips' , it may turn some profit. Because vanity is paramount, and girls who want to change their look on certain occasions are in legions.  For all the vacuous world loves sexy, big-ass lips. A pair of big lips for a few days. You know you want it, bitches.

EDIT// This happened a few years ago when I was 16. I wouldn't have done it now. Alcohol and friends encouragement go a long way when you are hanging at that age. I liked to disprove the doubters who had no balls to risk themselves. I'm still like that. Now slightly older,  still young,  I'm succeeding in life where some of them are not. I guess, I'm more rambunctious, but I'm driven as well. And i still think it's a workable idea.

Diurnal Quoteth:

The dissenter is every human being at those moments of his life when he resigns momentarily from the herd and thinks for himself.   -Archibald Macleish

Copyright (c) 2005 Sean Kemble  All rights reserved.